Friday, March 5, 2010

The Meaning of Friendship

When I was married to my ex husband ( 19 years from barely an adult to a grown woman ); he would say that you do not have friends, that you have acquaintances. That some of these acquaintances would last longer than others but eventually they all end. So this seems to be happening in a long term friendship of mine. This makes me sad, it feels unwarranted and I need to stop the nervous tic in my eye and move on. But damn! It hurts. Not a word, no explanation, no rationalized, justified cause. Just an ending. I am trying to be the Phoenix here who rises again from smoking ashes into something new, better, stronger. We will see and maybe as time passes; things will begin again. Until then, I am left looking for strength, wondering why and feeling ultimately wounded and angry. Sigh, sometimes we are doomed to repeat the same life lessons over and over. I suppose this is our journey on earth and rewards are small and daily with a better reward lying beyond. I will survive, I am strong.

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